What this is all about

Hi

This blog to me is an exploration of my sexuality and the hope is it will help my readers to do the same for them and in turn to help me.

Let me quickly explain what i mean by exploration. Sexuality for me was a thing never to be discussed at home, nor in college or at work. Shrouded in a thick veil of convention, I could bring myself to talk about it only with two or three very close friends. During three decades of marriage and a very satisfying sex life with my partner, Madeleine, I have still not been able to talk about it with her. She is not interested in discussing it, which was good, because she sported her preference for action and led me on several expeditions to explore the hidden tunnels of pleasure in her ample anatomy. But, alas, she has now lost the appetite for a good solid round of sex.

So to tell you the truth I have found it difficult to own up my sexuality. I do not admit to myself that I have sexual desires and fantasies, that I have felt a strong attraction towards eroticism and that I have used the internet to fill my voyeuristic urges. There was a time when I would feel guilty about it. It is not there in severity now. So it is time to figure out what all this means to me as a person, as a man and as a human being. What prevents acceptance? What drives surreptitious activity? What does Madeleine mean to me beyond her superb physicality?

Figuring out the landscape around these and similar questions is the Sexploration that I wish to undertake. Join in, if you like. That would be very good.